I saw a woman

Dance the way you do
the Venezuelan way
the weight on the front foot
and the hold
and then back onto the other foot
and the hold
I forgot that way
and I love that way
and I didn't know it
until I saw her do it
years ago
we had a good year and a half of that dance
I felt you immediately
thought of you in Sweden
Like all of you
I wasn't quite ready for you
unprepared, we happened any ways
and then unhappened too

the You changed
a year later
You were blond and ocean eyed
I was with you in Colombia
you brought tears to me
the way you understood
you- old man and small boy-
your combination
of play and depth
I crave still some days
Sounds and colors
our ecstatic frenzy
we were the church
you ran from
at 12

a year later
the You became
a Man
masculine
forceful
assertive
irreverent
You did as you pleased
and that pleased me
you weren't ready for me
for femininity
and gingerly
my raw exposure
And quicker than the rest
our off-road
adventure
fell apart on the concrete

All of you are inside now
all of you still linger

You are meaning

I long for the day
I can walk your forest path
Swim your caverns
Climb your slippery ice

I didn't want to leave
any of you
I barely got away
cowardly through words
but I had to

Destiny
could not
Wait
Now she and I walk together
remembering you
the love
the power
as fresh
as the first meal