Turbo Me

There is a turbo me
it can make light in dark
it's speed makes water out of ice
turbo me
likes to know
everything
turbo me
needs little evidence or proof
There is a turbo me
it gives false birth
all the time
it pushes against the downstream
my turbo shoulders
are tired from going
upstream
Turbo me
won't hear you sometimes
turbo me
fights the uncertainty
there is a turbo me
that skips paragraphs
the scenery and the setting
just to read the last line
turbo me
avoids the view
can't handle the journey
turbo me
is superficial shallow
and likes speed
turbo me
goes fast
to break hard

Superiority Complex

The high ceiling, state of the art meeting room, catered with chicken salad sandwiches and coffee
a place that Americans came to ruminate about Solving the World’s Problems
hosted the Afghan woman who told of bringing the internet to illiterate woman
and women previously ensnared in the corner of their houses became “fireballs”
A woman from her neighboring country sat in the audience
Reacting audibly though eluding reprimand
the obsessive commenter found the Afghan victory and the need for a $7000 generator “cute”
Remembering my year in battle with our Pakistani generator
And losing the fight with electricity in Kabul,
fire jetted from my pupils, onto her face, contorted by opinions
Later I realized I stole her sole moment of superiority since she moved West

Mine

Its mine
This morning
The quiet light
Of early morning rain
The building
The alley way
Normally in constant
Adjustment
Is inactive
It is morning
On Swann street
Awake,
Safe and cared for
In my spaces
I hold all of it
Like delicate china
The pieces
Of me
Are ancient
And revered
Here in this sweet place
In my sacred 800 sq feet
I am sorry
This morning
No one is allowed
In
I will dance in this light
Turn in these hours
Time will pass
The silence will
too

Unlatch

unfasten
from the anticipated
journey
wisdom
incubates my heart
while I unlatch
from what was supposed to
be

Dirt

change happens
like a transition
in the weather
the unexpected sunshine
that came through the bathwater
competing with the rain light
all that was there
beneath our daily occupations
all that we sensed
if we had time
comes into reality
like the dirt that accumulates
in the corner
attention forced
to the other
to the neglected
truth
the brave
will clean it up
with their hands
the rest
will just leave it behind

Reliable

9 AM
I go downstairs
of the building
housing eight
rent-controlled
one bedroom
homes
Our little dormitory
of mid-thirty year olds
working to save the world
Tyler is awake
And thankfully has made coffee
I hand him the pack I bought
in Colombia
We sit on the couch
Facing an off TV
Its early for both of us
For a Saturday morning
We converse
I can feel his care
like the sticky
scent of rain
he is gentle
steady
serious
as he listens
I know his words
Are chosen
His thoughts are
Delicate
Attempting to separate
What is
from what I say to him
as his perfectly brewed
dark selected coffee
wakes my tongue
his attention
is neither
forced
nor polite
the light of the apartment
sits on his photos from sudan
I know he is awaiting his phone
Call from her
In Uganda
As he does every weekend
his loyalty to
the authentic
life
seeps into me
the phone rings
I will see him later

Time Later

Time later, maybe an hour
Maybe four
I awoke to the light of the moon
Surprised by my surroundings
And the arms, like soft muscle ropes
Embracing me

Silent Tears

the kind of love

that a stranger

can feel

by the silent tears

of a

widowed wife

i am not sure god wants us to be happy all the time

god doesn't necessarily

want us to be happy

my friend the stock broker 

told me over the phone

in the middle of 

700bn debate

we had our own

"I believe in the free market"

"no socialism"

but what about the

assymetry of information?

I asked him

we need regulations

"yes ok but we shouldn't go extreme"

he asked me "do you think the government

is too big?"

I think the departments are doing it right, housing,

transportation, state, justice, we need them.

We need to develop them so they can help

us transition into a new model of living

in America, a more sustainable model of living

more environmental

more economical...

but if people want to buy huge homes

and not small environmental friendly

homes

then let them

let the market decide

yes

but if the developer can buy the land

for 20% more 

then the small community is gone

yes but then thats what people want

because the market allows it

please tell me you aren't voting for McCain

well why should I vote for Obama

I told him

he said "no i don't agree with any of it"

and so you are going to vote on

abortion?

YES

I am not going to allow anyone to kill

a child

we are not allowed to kill people in the law

so why should we be able to kill babies

why can't we have the power to make those

decisions

every individual for herself

this is a contradiction of your free market ideals

yea maybe

i believe god 

has given us the ability

to do what is calm

peaceful and good for society

and for the world

and what brings us happiness

"i am not sure god wants happiness for us,

not all of the time"

really? 

and what about abstinence only?

what about with your daughter?

"i will talk to her about abstinence"

but will you talk with her about what she

is supposed to do when she has her urges 

when she is alone with her boyfriend

who she thinks loves her very much

and who she wants the attention of

and wants to be close to?

what will she do then

and if she hasn't been told about

condoms or birth control

or if those are not options

then she will just go for it

in the moment

"yea thats a good point"

Ugly

the cineplex of five small theatres

with small chairs

that swung back and forth

because the screws are a bit loose

closed

a few months ago

at the beginning of the summer

the HR associate 

told us smiling

"a CVS is coming downstairs"

I almost puked

a CVS? to replace

the rooms

where I spent my most intimate

nights in Washington?

where I sat for an hour after 

Habla Con Ella

just crying 

where I walked out of another film

too cheesy to handle?

a CVS will move into that venerable

place in my heart?

Consumer Value Stores now rebranded

as consumer, value, service

I walked passed the building

the door ajar

a construction worker standing there

and I saw their 

re-creation

renovation

the candy case

and popcorn counter

gone

pasty

glue white walls replaced

dark brown walls

walls that held you in

made you feel 

that you were entering the cave

of fantasy

hiding from the world

about to have an adventure

away from the open skies

of outside

but now it was an open

open space

of fluorescent lights

and cheap dry wall

the store front windows

previously hanging the latest

innovations in film

would soon be filled

with over-priced discount toothpaste

and cheap christmas

decorations

today I saw back inside the

movie theatre

and gazing back at me was

a vacuous white hole

soon to be filled

with damaging

preservatives

plastics

and hurried

customers

that day

across from me

blue eyes

and light hair

taught me 

new things

fingers tracing lines

in the 

broken shelled shore

before the glory of

torquoise water

he was the wise one

and i, the student,

we moved back and forth

between those

titles

equals?

perhaps

we rolled into the water

the uphill portion

seeking a rock

outside

to hold onto

the unknown

was overwhelming

we needed to talk

but what to say

do you know?

no

do i?

no

okay so we keep going?

yes...

what about those

others over there

they seem to know

they look so sure

they knew from the beginning

they declared it

why don't we

why can't we

futile comparisons 

that result in danger

we choose to sit 

in the uncertainty

its difficult

but that is the upward

portion of this

pleasant walk

entropy

the quiet hallway

a sign of change

a grand adjustment

people were confused

inside the caves 

where the organs

of feeling sit

working mates 

were let go 

in the worst of times

do-gooders

in the same predicament of those crooks

on that skinny street in

new york

friends

a strange odd family

brought together

split up by capitalism

and the order of the universe

the office was quiet today

and confused

four people less

the bustling

activity

came to 

murmurs

and whispers

commentary on decisions

management gone wrong?

just sad,

it was really just that we were

sad

She is A Woman

 

She is a woman

A woman

She took it

From you

And them

Her womanhood

She took it back

She takes it back

Every day

She takes back

Every moment

You try to have it

One day

She won’t have to

It won’t even be

Accessible to you

It will just stay with her

For now

She is fighting

To keep it

Through all of it

She is a woman

happens

Chance is always powerful.
Let your hook be always cast.
In the pool where you least expect it,
will be a fish.

~ Ovid

A Mockery of Audacious Women

http://warner.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/09/04/the-mirrored-ceiling/?em

within

"The greatest joys, adventures, pleasures, and successes are not without, but within your family, within your relationship, within your bedroom, within yourself. The outside world has its virtues no doubt, and I am a big fan of them- but the best is within."

bajo

Lo que existe

15 metres 

bajo 

la superficie del agua 

es un movimiento

pequenita grande

de nostros

como las olas

de un pescadito

que emociona

el agua

yo las siento

cuando 

habia tiempo

que no hablamos

y nuestra superficie 

esta en calma

Why

If a man should importune me to give a reason why I loved him, I find it could no otherwise be expressed, than by making answer: because it was he, because it was I. -Michel de Montaigne, essayist (1533-1592)

Francis Bacon

"The creative process is a cocktail of instinct, skill, culture and a highly creative feverishness. It is not like a drug; it is a particular state when everything happens very quickly, a mixture of consciousness and unconsciousness, of fear and pleasure; it’s a little like making love, the physical act of love."